Neurotic

According to the quiz, I'm neurotic as hell...
Kinda explains why I never feel well...
I have delusions of grandeur; I'm a star in my mind...
Yet in this mundane world I am confined...
Narcissistic yet self-loathing; I always expected more...
It takes everything I have to not walk through that door...
The older I get, the more I have to lose...
It's called insanity now instead of issues...
When I was 7 I had an epiphany...
"I was destined for greatness!",  I proclaimed gregariously...
Almost 40 years later, where did I go?
Am I addicted, or was life a placebo?
I'm struggling to hold on to that claim...
Destined for greatness and critical acclaim...
The reality is I'm nothing and no one...
 But I am one hell of an abomination...