Prologue for “My Story” (Working Title)
This is the story of my life. Who am I? I’m no one really; just an average guy trying to survive this crazy life. This is not a narcissistic, autobiography spelling out all of the successes in life. There is no climatic ending how I triumphed despite great odds. Success, I suppose, means different things to different people. Have I ever had financial success? Let me think… No. I grasp the concept of having money about as well I grasp quantum physics written in Chinese. This is more of my weird and twisted perspective on my own life and as toot observations of those I have encountered over the years.
It’s a story about where I’ve been and all the people and events that shaped me into what I am today. This story is forty two years in the making, and there have been a lot of wild things happen during that time. This narrative explains and highlights some of those insane experiences that molded me into adulthood. “If I could only go back and change things,” seems to be a reoccurring theme, but in retrospect, all the things that have happened made me the unique person I am today. Going back and changing things could have ultimately altered how I turned out. Perhaps that would be a good thing, but then and again, I am one of a kind thanks to the good and the bad things that have happened during the course of this insane journey called life…
Just some of the roles I’ve played on this stage called life include: a strung-out rock drummer, a father, a mindless office worker, a college teacher, and a semi-homeless, hopeless guy writing his book on borrowed time. I’m actually writing this with numb fingers because our heat went out, and we are on the verge of being evicted any day now. Hopefully I can finish writing this before the electricity goes out as well. I have done some pretty stupid and amazing things in my life. I have been at rock-bottom (i.e. currently), but I’ve also been at the pentacle of reason and responsibility. I have been a care-receiver as well as a care-giver. I have been a son and then a father. I have been at the height of recklessness and confusion, yet I have had profound awakenings about myself. I have gone through mind-numbing years; utterly lost and aimless. Hell, I’m still kind of lost and aimless come to think of it.
Like most people in the world, I have witnessed births, deaths, marriages, and divorces. I have laughed and cried. I have loved and lost. It’s all pretty typical of someone my age, but I have also seen great sorrows and darkness that many have never experienced. I have been to the very gates of hell. I have literally been on the edge of death more times than I’d like to admit. I had a troubled and tumultuous childhood which catapulted me into the arms of an unsavory crowd. I dwelled within the seedy underbelly of society; playing gigs in dirty little bars from the time I was seventeen years old. I have struggled with mental illness, addictions, and self-induced hurdles that impeded my ability to even function in life. I have overcome a lot, but I am still trying to reach that summit of real self-worth.
The following is my distinct recollection of events stretching back to when I was about six years old. These stories are not meant to blame anyone for the way I turned out. I try not to hold people culpable for the way I am today, but I believe you are ultimately the sum of everything that ever happened to you, and how people treated you over the years. These anecdotes are mainly just stupid observations. Some of them are hilarious, while others are tragic; but they are ALL extremely personal and honest. I have opened up more than I ever have in written form. Genetics and environment play a huge part, but I also think that all of your experiences help build your perspective about life.
Within the following pages is my life; completely raw and exposed. In fact, I’ve done some pretty horrible things. If anything, this shines a light on my true identity. Some of the names have been changed to protect the innocent, and some of them have not. All of it is as ingenuous and probably as blunt as possible. While perhaps I remember things differently than others, this is the way I recall things. This is my life in my own words and in my own unique perspective. By writing about all of this stuff in great detail, I hope to understand things a little better about myself in the process. This is my ultimate therapy. Some of these stories you can’t make up, so stranger than fiction is an understatement. I deliver this book in my usual somewhat witty and sarcastic manner. Hopefully some of my memories will make you laugh, or at least make you realize that your life really isn’t that bad… At any rate, hope you enjoy it!
-D. Hoover
No comments:
Post a Comment