Cooled

There is a fine line between visceral hatred and love. What side am I on?

Sweat runs into my eyes mixed with my tears and anger. Angry at myself or at it? Hard to say. I see only in a tint of gray. Regret fills my lungs like the muddy waters of the river in which I float. Do I take a deep breath of water or do I live another day of misery? The choice seems obvious now. Loveless, soulless, I seek only retribution for my travesties. Drown me in the muddy waters. Cool my hair in the morning. Redeem my soul in the early evening. Fuck this lifeless life. See you all over there or not. At least I will finally be cooled...