Self realization

All lame, dark poetry aside, this is one of those introspective blog entries that will sound like a bunch of self-loathing crap, so I apologize preemptively...
I am 44 years old, with a presumably dead-end job... I have no real discernable talents or actual money-making skills. My contribution to society is extremely limited, and I have a lot of issues. I'm not sure when the last of my motivation left, but it did so in the middle of the night, with no note... Instead of making this about all my failures, I should say that for some people, this is as good as it gets. I have a stable job, and a loving family. I just always thought I'd be further in life than I currently find myself. I can point to a million people who found success at an early age, but what is success? Perhaps I am just in a past mid-life crisis. Let's face it, if I was mid-life, my life expectancy would be 88. Not going to happen. So, I find myself in this awkward place, feeling sorry for myself and the lack of legacy I am leaving behind. This is truly the purpose of my blog... To vent.... Now back to your regularly scheduled poetic programming....